Sausage-Samurai's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[Pink Lemonade opening vid]

I like the cut of your jib

This movie is the tops, don't get me wrong. But after I found out that everybody on the show is a muff-diver the name "Pink Lemonade" gained another meaning, pretty funny, but not as cute as before. Oh yeah, and how do they have babies?

["Girls"]

Social Evolution is in Danger!

I agree with you fully, not that I hate women, and I understand why some people might get angered at this piece, particularly those currently dating idiots they somehow have enough brain damage to find attractive. But I'd take it to an even higher level, I don't mind it at all, on a small scale because they're only hurting themselves, but when you allow the DNA of total fuck wads to come into my species' gene pool, ruining the very foundations of Social Evolution. I mean Jesus Christ, I don't want to have to put up with your moronic ignorant disgusting offspring now or in the future. Seriously though, these people should be receiving cold metal slugs in their stomachs rather than getting bj's. Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to go blow my load into a tube sock just thinking about this movie.

[Anti-War Liberals]

I'm a silly boy...

I found the message to be pretty decent, even if I am someone who is opposed to this present war... my own father was one of those people who came back from Vietnam and was openly greeted with hatred and violence from a crowd of smelly hippies. Yes we should be grateful for what our forefathers fought and died for, in the case of the war in Iraq though (which I won't pretend I have some kind of ultimate solution for) the people sending this nation's soldiers... most of whom are kids out of high school who only want college money (I KNOW a great many of them, they aren't really any different from you or me) Bush and Cheney, were both draft dodgers themselves, and have never seen the reality of war. Not all liberals are against this war, not all Republicans are in favor of action, not all SOLDIERS / VETERANS are in favor of action either... you do know that right?.

I guess now that Saddam is out of power, and we've forced the country of Iraq to simultaneously adore / hate us, there's not much I can say. I knew we'd win against a country that hadn't advanced its military technology since the U.N placed sanctions on it back in the early 90's, and had willingly destroyed more than 90% of its weapons since then. Doesn't make it right. Yes I'm glad to see the bastard go, I'm sure the Iraqi people are too, but do we really have to be such crazy, bloodthirsty, bastards that we have to go after every spooky villainous character that exists on earth? I mean, many of our supposed allies are quite autocratic themselves. I'd gladly show my support for our troops, and if that's all your movie was asking for then that's peachy keen with me. But I will not agree to this 'Patriotism means no questions' / Neo-McCarthyism mentality, I will not shed a tear when I see an American flag sticker on the back of some fatass soccer mom's SUV, whose 'enlightened' political beliefs come from her 'diverse' news sources consisting of CNN, MSNBC, and FOX NEWS, sitting on your ass and watching war on TV all day doesn't make you smart. Hey that’s a good idea, I think we should wage a ‘War on Stupid Fat-Ass Suburban House Wives’. I will not pretend that calling French-Fries "FREEDOM FRIES" isn't the stupidest thing I've ever heard. I will continue to look at all Americans, and all people, whether they are in favor of the war or not, as my brothers. The more we fight amongst ourselves, the easier it will be for us to be controlled. If you write back, please don’t boil me down to the label of a ‘Liberal’, I’ll admit I do dislike Capitalism, but I can see the problems in Liberal philosophy just as well as you can, and sometimes I do find myself hating them just as much as I hate Conservatives. Be that a little weird… I guess I’m just a silly boy after all. ^_^

CRAZY-MEXICAN0 responds:

Thanks for your imput, all though you need to get some of your facts right, 90%, I highly doubt that. That number is obiously distorted or taken out of some context, because if the Iraqi's were actively destroying weapons then we wouldn't have this problem.

[This Is Not A Test 6]

Definitley deserves a lot more credit

This entire series is one of my favorites, its original, has a good plot, and the techniques used make it very cinematic. Sure it's a little old now, and its once brilliant prescence has been smothered by the fads of the new. But your creativity still amazes me, and I'm going to watch some of the others movies you made that I've never had the chance to see right now. Keep on creating Brian ;)

[College University pt 4-1]

Another College University Masterpiece

College University has a sense of humor/style that could rival against such other animated comdey shows like the Simpsons, or Futurama. Everything about this show you created is brilliant as well as entertaining, The cast of characters is great, and I like the use of such pop culture icons as Optimus prime, but you don't overuse and totally flood the show with them which is good. You manage to keep the story line original. That's why I was disgusted by PieHead's last review on this movie, there is nothing wrong with not liking something but you should see what he wrote. His claims that your show is "so cliche" really pissed me off, and how he claims Jay is the stereotypical token black guy. Jay is the very antithesis of a token black guy, Parks acts more "black" than he does for crying out loud. He would have known this if he wasn't so damn ignorant, and actually watched the other movies. Plus all the movies he ever made are either stolen, or those that say "Vote 5 to see more porn" he really disgusts me. You as authors are brilliant and I laugh my ass off every time I watch these cartoons, I'm not trying to be a kiss ass or anything, I just can't find any way this show could be improved.
Make more! but take your time, we don't want the show to be more about quantity then quality.

[Cat in the Kettle]

Chinese is the best

Im not going to point to you about the other "Cat in the kettle" movie, you prolly know about it as well.
Not a bad job man, I liked it. The chinese people were drawn a little......crudley that was a little mean of you, I know your not a racist but Im just saying. Also I don't wanna break your spirit but I recieved a "#1 portal movie of the day" awhile ago and look at me today, Im a worthless shit!. Dont become like me! Keep up the good work!

[Enter Strawberry Clock]

* chuckle * Not bad Orange

Your movies seem to be the only decent ones that ever come out of the clock crew ( not that Im degraded the clock crew ), you should take over and kick Strawberry-Clock off his high horse. I like how you used lines from the Transformers movie, but lets not forget Unicron died in the end and Galvatron survived, and that would mean Carrot would have won after all :(

[Honey Roasted Peanuts]

You have degraded something sacred you bastard!

I don't have a probelm with you clock guys, because I know you only make your movies to piss people off ( Im judging your movie and not the clock crew ). But you definitley crossed the line when you destroyed one of the most brilliant movies on the portal. That would be "Whyyy ?" by the great "Brian James" ( you could have atleast mentioned his name you pig ), Brian James actually made a movie called "Portal Detour" which states how he doesn't like crappy movies or the people who make them, so don't go thanking him for anything, because he wouldn't like you.

RaspberryClock responds:

The Clock Crew loves everyone equally, so I'm sure he doesn't hate us because he has no reason to. And I did mention his name in the Audio credits: "Mr. James."